Toddler Upset: Is It a Tantrum Or Frustration Fit & How To Respond To Each

0:00 so when we start little we want to know the difference between a tantrum and what I've called a fit that's a very scientific term but a tantrum and a fit the Tantrums are a baby's form of Rage biologically it's the same a tantrum and rage are the same except they're little it says my nervous system is overwhelmed I'm too tired I'm too hungry

0:33 I'm too something it's I've blown a fuse they are usually unable to make words or speak mostly screaming and crying they actually can cry real tears and it mostly happens from 1 to four years of age and hopefully stops okay different than a fit which is anger because I didn't get what I

1:04 wanted they're trying to get you to give in so that the world goes their way we're trying to say the world's not going to go your way now nor is it ever going to go your way now uh and they're able to State their demands so they're screaming stuff let's say they're four my world is terrible nobody loves me you're the worst mother in in the world okay that's a fit there's no real tears they'll try

1:36 their best to maybe pour some out but they're not and these fits can last last a lifetime you've seen them right that's does everybody see the difference my especially my infant toddler because you need to respond to these differently if you let a child having a real tantrum unable to speak crying real tears 1 to four years old then you

2:06 are overdeveloping their rage reaction does that make sense some people say let's put them in bed and let them cry themselves to sleep so usually and they're exhausted and this we're going to throw them in there and shut the door and we're going to let them just cry it out that's saying we're going to let your rage system mature let's just keep put you in the

2:37 RoR row and start singing now because it's going to keep going however a fit everybody see it's we can't let a rage go on and on with little kids because it'll overdevelop their brain is developing like this and now it's going to it's going to accommodate and develop a round raging okay so when they have a fit they want you to give

3:07 in uh and there's the behaviors I already shed with you their adult response we calm down your arms going like this they look we breathe uh you wanted uh more ice cream um uh so and you wanted more ice cream and it's hard now you have a choice you can have milk or orange juice and they are like you know but that's it you have done your Judy you show them the light

3:41 here's your here's the light I've helped I've zipped you up to here I've headed you this way I've done my job now walk away walk away but what I see people doing is oh that's so hard honey you wanted to do it you can handle they keep talking because they want them to happy up now all you got to do is point them towards the light that you've done your

4:12 job when you walk away of course you're not walking away like a stupid little Sor I never should have had that one you know you're not going to walk away like that you're going to walk away breathing and wishing the child well knowing for a fact that you've shown them where the light is and just like any tree out there it'll find its way but we talk too much oh honey oh honey oh honey and then you get fed up with

4:37 them shut up right you honey honey honey honey I've had it with you so we don't need to do that show them the way and move on now with a child who's having a tantrum you've got to this you can see the difference can you see the difference okay pick them up put them on your chest and download them turn off the system and stay with

5:09 them make sense so you infant toddler people can plant a seed now for your preschool people your preschool pay people pay a seed for the first and second grade second grade pay a seed and we're all going to do well