# Time Machine - Middle School Girl Learns to be Assertive at Home

**Creator:** Conscious Discipline
**Platform:** youtube
**Duration:** 2m
**Source:** https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=13s8ft0Fawo

## Summary

A teacher recounts her experience with a sixth-grade girl who is struggling emotionally due to her parents' breakup. The girl feels responsible for the situation and has expressed her hurt feelings, prompting the teacher to provide support and guidance.

- The girl has been visibly upset in class, indicating distress over her parents' separation.
- She believes she is at fault for her parents' issues, as her mother has expressed anger towards her.
- The teacher reassures her that the situation is not her fault and encourages her to express her feelings.
- The girl has a designated "safe place" in the classroom where she can go to cope with her emotions.
- The teacher emphasizes the importance of using her voice to communicate her feelings to her mother.
- The conversation highlights the emotional impact of family dynamics on children.
- The teacher recognizes the need for continued support and open communication with the girl.

## Transcript

[[0:00]](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=13s8ft0Fawo&t=0s)
i have a young girl in my classroom this is her second year so she was with me in fifth grade and she's with me now in sixth grade two days in this month she has come crying she was walking like this she was trying to get past me and she had a head down with her hair in front of her face so i couldn't see her and i'm like wait a minute come here what is wrong

[[0:28]](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=13s8ft0Fawo&t=28s)
and she was like eyes all wedding stuff what is going on okay and so she explained my stepfather and my mom is breaking up and she said my mom told me it's all my fault my mom took her anger out on me when her and my stepdad were getting into fights and she looked right at me and she really said some really hurtful things which kind of ruined my day this morning at the end of the day

[[0:59]](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=13s8ft0Fawo&t=59s)
it is not your fault that's grown-up stuff it don't have nothing to do with you she told me miss bryant i need to go to the safe place and i said okay you can go to the safe place although you go to the safe place you still have your work that you need to do she need to go home and use her voice to tell her mom how she's feeling so what about this time what what

[[1:30]](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=13s8ft0Fawo&t=90s)
happened monday when i had to talk to her again she just sat down and let me speak and i interrupted me like the other time yeah so she realized that whatever problems yeah whatever problems she have is not your problem right that's grown-up problem she's going to be like that one more time right but what are you gonna do if she does i'll just have to talk with her because she needs that help because what

[[2:02]](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=13s8ft0Fawo&t=122s)
part of the brain when we was talking about the rule of three and the parts of the brain what part of the brain your mom is really at right now she's in the emotional state because that's a that's that's a big jump going from having a two-parent hole to a one-parent hole and having have to be the main provider you might have to keep doing that with your mom all right you might have to keep using your voice