Transcript
0:00 I will say one of the most powerful statements I really work with families around is help me understand. I don't know a single kid that doesn't get out of their childhood without saying, "You just don't understand." I'm going to say right now, every single parent needs to expect that from their kid. When we don't understand something, it often provokes this like, "What are you doing? Why are you doing that?" Why we do that though is because we're scared. I don't understand this version of you. Who are you? What is this? Are you lying to other people? What are you doing when I'm not with you? Right? So, it's so much more. And so, I want every parent to hear like, "Yes, you yelled. Yes, I have yelled as a parent. We lose it. We don't understand in the moment. We didn't say the right thing at the right time, right?" But, you step away and you take a breather. The ability to go back and say, "You know, last night when you were doing all that trickery and trying to fool me, I got really mad and I yelled. While I am sorry I yelled, I really thought about it and I'm just scared cuz I I'm not understanding this."
Summary
- Every child will express feelings of being misunderstood by their parents.
- Parents should expect and accept these feelings as part of the parenting journey.
- Misunderstandings often stem from fear and concern about a child's behavior.
- It's normal for parents to lose their temper; acknowledging this is crucial.
- Taking a moment to reflect and return to the child with understanding can strengthen the relationship.
- Apologizing for outbursts while expressing fear and confusion can foster better communication.
- Encouraging open dialogue helps bridge the gap of misunderstanding between parents and children.