Transcript
0:00 Doing things for our family and for others out of resentment and feeling hard done by and feeling let down is no kind of generosity. It's it's not an impressive act. It's not valiant and uh you know it's not something to aspire to. None of us like ourselves when we're giving giving giving giving but we're furious about giving. Now, let me ask you, have you been on the receiving end of that? Have you been on the receiving end of someone who worked themselves to the bone? You know, feels like a floor rag, feels disheveled, feels hard done by, feels like, oh, I'm so tired and I haven't had any time for myself, and I've just been doing everything for other people, and I've had this, this, this, and this on my to-do list, and everybody bailed out.
0:45 But I did it. I stayed. I ran the I'm the best and here I am and I'm just so dedicated and you owe me because I've been doing all of this for you and you should say thank you and you should be appreciative and you don't even see me and you don't even hear me. Have you been on the receiving end of that kind of giving? Because here's the tough love reality. That's not giving. That's not generous.
1:08 That's not gracious. And nobody wants it. I had to learn this the hard way. my kids, my husband, my family would rather I have a a dirty home, dirty laundry, um [cough] fast food, um and all of the rest if it means that I'm not in a victim mindset, feeling resentful, angry, hard done by, and annoyed by everyone else. Nothing else.
Summary
- Generosity should stem from genuine goodwill, not resentment.
- Giving out of obligation leads to feelings of anger and victimhood.
- Recipients can sense when giving is motivated by resentment.
- Acknowledging personal needs is essential for healthy relationships.
- It's better to have a less-than-perfect environment than to give while feeling resentful.
- True generosity fosters positive connections, while resentful giving creates tension.
- Prioritizing self-care can lead to more authentic and joyful giving.