Transcript
0:00 I remember one time my daughter came home and asked [clears throat] for a sleepover. >> Yeah. >> And I said no. And I felt very sure that a sleepover would not be wise or good for her. >> But she didn't feel that way. >> And as she began to escalate and share very demonstrabably loudly how she felt about that. >> Yeah. [snorts] >> Um I I paused and I thought, whoa, I'm I'm getting caught up. >> Yeah. I'm I'm tempted to get consumed by her being upset. I could feel my body rising.
0:34 >> And I just thought I can care without being consumed. >> Oh, that's good. Say it again. >> I can care without being consumed. >> Yeah. >> If I can check myself and I'm like, "Nope, I'm good. >> I'm sure about my decision. She's not, but I am." Right. And made that distinction. And I thought, well, I can consider what it's like to be her. I can care. I can comfort her. Oh, that's so hard. I know you have to get permission from parents for every good idea you have. [laughter] And I can be confident though.
1:11 >> Yeah. >> That she'll move through this feeling and that I'm doing what's best for her. And eventually, maybe she'll see it, [music] maybe not. >> [music]
Summary
- The parent initially denies the daughter's request for a sleepover, feeling it is not wise.
- The daughter reacts strongly, escalating her emotions in response to the denial.
- The parent recognizes the temptation to become overwhelmed by the daughter's feelings.
- They affirm the mantra, "I can care without being consumed," highlighting the balance between empathy and self-assurance.
- The parent acknowledges the difficulty of navigating their child's emotions while standing firm in their decision.
- They express confidence that the daughter will eventually process her feelings, regardless of whether she agrees with the decision.