Loving Bravely, Dr.Solomon, and Love Classrooms. | Psychology Podcast

0:00 today i'm talking to dr alexandra solomon clinical psychologist and professor at the family institute at northwestern university she is the author of loving bravely and i am thrilled to welcome her today one of the first things i wonder about is you talk about this idea of a love classroom do you can we start there and tell us what what does that even mean let's start there it's a great place to start so this is um the paradigm shift that i

0:28 think is so essential for individual health and relational health is that we really start to take seriously the idea that all of our relationships are here to teach us it changes us from a stance of either i'm right and you're wrong or you're right and i'm wrong to a stance that's far more relational where we're now shoulder to shoulder looking together at the inevitable challenges crises

0:58 problems differences of opinion personality differences that come up in all of our relationships whether that's spousal relationships parent-child relationships friendships the data is clear that the quality of our relationships is a massive determinant in the quality of our lives so at one at the very sort of primary level the love classroom is this idea that i take myself to be a student and a teacher and all of the relationships i'm in right that whatever my relationship is presenting me with is

1:31 an opportunity for learning versus a mindset that's so easy to get into which is that i'm frustrated with you i'm frustrated with what you're doing that's making my life harder