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0:01 hello facebook hi guys come on in and join me it's a rainy day here where i am in new york a cozy afternoon i wanted to just share with you a fabulous new master class that i am doing for free next week and i wanted to talk about it a little bit so before i do so say hello to me tell me where you're signing in from [Music]

0:34 you know as as i do this work with people helping people in their pain i often mostly meet people when they are at some sort of crisis point their breaking point and you may wonder if i am somewhat of a sucker for pain and the answer is no i'm really a sucker for growth and i've seen consistently somehow

1:05 we humans take growth seriously only when we are in pain you and i have met many people when they go through a health crisis now all of a sudden they're thinking about growth they're thinking about eating well and exercising well when they're when they're dumped by their lovers they're like i'm going to show them i'm going to get into the best shape of

1:37 my life when their kid is in trouble they're like oh let's call dr shafali or let's call a therapist let's seek help so for some reason it appears to be the human condition to only think about growth when they are in pain if they even do that after they have done the blaming after they've blamed the higher powers after they've blamed

2:09 the government after they've blamed their partners their mothers then they may think about growth but at least they think about growth at some point when they are in deep pain so no i am not a sucker for pain i know that pain is an awakener it is the portal that we humans seem to prefer to grow god forbid we just wake up one

2:41 day and say it's a beautiful day my life is really okay right now how can i grow so growth is what i am after are we growing i say this to my daughter all the time it doesn't matter where you go to school it doesn't matter what your life circumstance it doesn't matter how many boyfriends dump you what matters is if you are growing

3:13 you can be with the same person and it could be called successful but if you're not growing you're not really growing so growth has me captured working with people client of the client family after family because i am chasing growth are we growing am i growing can we evolve as a species can we

3:44 raise ourselves into a different level of consciousness so many of you know i write books because that's my way to communicate i'm a writer more than i am a speaker even though i talk all the time but i'm really a writer and i write about how people can transform the pain that they are experiencing into power if someone was to ask me you know what

4:15 do you write about you know i think i write about suffering and how to use the portal of suffering to evolve evolution and growth are the fruits on the tree but the roots are how to transform the suffering so all my books you know they're called parenting books or they're called wisdom books but they're really at their core how to help our children suffer less how to help ourselves suffer less

4:45 and how to evolve because if we don't have evolution and a higher consciousness as our prize then life appears to be a series of random events it appears as if life is just happening to us and we are caught in the male storm of life haplessly bystanding while life happens to us rams into us or passes us by

5:16 when we have evolution as the prize this begins to turn around now suddenly you realize life isn't happening to me i am a full-on participant i'm not the creator of everything but i am a participant in every moment of my life if not the first moment every moment after so i may not have created somebody colliding into me in their car but i am

5:48 a participant because i was on that road i was on that road at that time i was driving by that car and every reaction after the collision is my direct participation so growth allows us to participate in our lives in a more conscious manner when our prize is growth now we realize that we are co-creators with our life and when we realize we're co-creators now we step out of the passenger seat into the

6:20 driver's seat so that is what my work is about how to help parents help their children suffer less how do parents help their children suffer less by the parents evolution when the parent evolves when the parent raises themselves into wholeness they no longer need their children to be the extensions of themselves they no longer need their children to fulfill their unmet needs they no longer need to use their

6:50 children or anyone else they stop their parasitic tendencies onto others stops similarly their tendency to react to other people's parasitism stops because as you grow into wholeness you stop needing others and you stop allowing them to need you in a way that is toxic you evolve you grow you enter wholeness so growth has to be the prize and sadly

7:21 in today's world growth is not the prize money is the prize looks are the prize status is the prize achievement is the prize where's growth do we have a subject at school called self growth maybe in some fabulous new agey mindfulness based school sure but i'm talking about mainstream curriculum our children taught that growth is the blossom growth is the harvest growth is the gold at the end of the rainbow

7:52 are they taught that growth is what you go for no they're not taught that they're barely taught anything that's really functional sorry to say they are but but they're taught competition is important comparison is important success is important money is important achievement is important fitting in is important and being on top is important that that hot and that's not completely useless but it is really irrelevant when the

8:22 rubber meets the road in our lives because when the rubber meets the road trigonometry doesn't help us coming first in class doesn't help us what helps us is the right perspective is the right inner wisdom to understand that we are here not to be the best we're not here to be the most beautiful we're not here to catch the fanciest husband or drive in the fanciest car we are here for one fruit only are we growing

8:52 but that's not taught so my work through people's pain is to help people grow and when you begin to grow and when you begin to covet growth and when you begin to see yourself growing that each day you're moving an inch more expensively now your life takes a whole different turn now you begin to design your life more and more consciously now you begin to make choices that ask

9:23 is this going to grow me up am i entering wholeness right now or am i entering scarcity how can i live my best most riches most present life right now so that's what i do anyway many of you have read my books and many of you know me to be more in parenting well i'm coming out with a new book and i am going to give a free master class on this book

9:54 i'm sorry it is upside down or you know whatever but it's called a radical awakening turn pain into power embrace your truth live free so go to a radicalawakening.com buy a book or many and then register step two will ask you to register for a free master class that i am doing on march 5th you don't

10:27 want to miss it it's for free you will also when you sign up immediately get a beautiful free pdf sent to your email so you get a free pdf and a free master class next week march 5th if you buy this new book of mine what is this book about it talks about how each one of us can radically awakening awaken can undergo a radical awakening

11:00 i wrote this book after my divorce because i went through the second most radical awakening of my life in my early 40s i went through my first radical awakening in my early 20s that was when i began to meditate and i was introduced to the buddha's teachings and my mind exploded my first radical

11:31 awakening was at the age of 21. i was too young for that radical awakening i think and too immature because it confused the f out of me and as much as it confused me the good thing it did for me is that it made me become a true seeker from the age of 22 just to give it an arbitrary time frame i went on a quest to discover

12:03 truths about life about human psychology about cultural psychology about how we came to be the way we did and for the next 22 years that's what i did i was a wife i was a mother and then in my early 40s i experienced my second renaissance and really broke free from the last vestiges of fear that were

12:36 enslaving me and this book is a testimony to that journey and it has pieces of my story but it's really about the journey that each one of us has either taken or longs to take on their path from enslavement to freedom on their path from unworthiness to worth on their path from fear to courage so this is my gift to myself

13:09 and to anyone who wishes to read it to open their mind to enter into a new territory of liberation so this book is long it's deep it has a little bit to do with parenting but not entirely it goes into our sexuality it goes into relationships it goes into boundaries it goes into

13:41 um how women are conditioned to be servile and silent and how men are conditioned to be toxic sometimes and how we can't blame our men and we can't blame ourselves so this is a book about a deeper dive into what makes us us and how we can understand ourselves so that we can break free from everything that is holding us back

14:13 this is not a motivational book you know i've said it many many times that i really don't care to motivate people because motivation to me is transient i care to help you awaken because when you awaken you're motivated motivation is the tip of the iceberg awakening is the whole deal because when you awaken you can't go back to sleep and once you awaken you live a presence-filled purposeful life

14:44 so my goal is not in pleasing you as people know if they've taken a course or entertaining you although i'm told i can be entertaining but it is not my intention or to motivate you or to make you happy i don't give two hoots about your happiness sorry too transient i care about something way more deeper way more lasting

15:15 way more true and that goes right to the source so this book goes to the source of why you can't be all that you want to be why you're still mired in unworthy patterns why you still live in fear and hesitation and doubt and self-criticism why you live in shame and blame and guilt this is that book so it's not one to motivate you and to tell you that yeah you should be this and you should be that it goes deep to

15:47 the roots of your conditioning and shows you the path step by step that you need to walk toward your liberation so it is a deep book so it is for the brave for the courageous for the daring who really want to learn how to finally live this life authentically who want to go deep within themselves and enter a communion with themselves

16:20 so go to a radical awakening dot com a radical awakening dot com buy a book or two sign up for step two which will give you a free master class which i'm holding next friday march 5th free all of you can register and join my free master class next friday i will be talking about the book a little bit and talking about how we can all awaken so march 5th

16:53 free masterclass go to a radicalawakening.com you also get a free pdf people like free gifts so i'm giving them away free pdf free masterclass share the book share the website beautiful videos on the website watch them a radical awakening dot com a radical awakening.com did i say that enough okay so i hope you join me i hope you um

17:24 sign up for my masterclass on march 5th and i will see you there let us begin to awaken i will be holding many video sessions and interviews with people about their awakening because that's what this is all about and corona has shown us that it's time it's time for us to move out of our own way to move out of despair and despondency and loneliness

17:56 and understand how we can evolve to our best communion our best intimacy our best marriage and our best selves so a radicalawakening.com go there right now you get a free pdf as soon as you sign up and you will be asked to register for my masterclass so buy the book go back to the website step two says register put in your receipt number and you will enroll for my masterclass on march 5th

18:26 free masterclass you may want to join thank you everyone i'll be coming on every day so if you don't want to hear me talk about my book don't sign on but i i gotta do what i gotta do to talk about my new book a radical awakening go to a radical awakening dot com turn pain into power embrace your truth live free radical awakening dot com free master class march 5th bye everyone