Enter the Queen!

0:01 hey everyone come on in it's book club number 43. this is the book this is the book come on in everyone good to see you all we're going to talk about how to embrace the queen energy today what that means so it's going to be an interesting topic come on in book club number 43 good to see you all we are talking about a radical awakening

0:32 and how to embrace the energy of queen michelle thank you you say my book is amazing [Music] so this is 43 i'm going to go to 52 so we have nine more book clubs i was just going through the book and lo and behold i've pretty much covered everything without having an order i didn't go much into the sexuality part of it because it's all in the book but maybe i'll go through it in

1:03 some part of this book club but i've pretty much in an organic way covered everything so in this book i talk about developing the queen energy and what it means for us women to embrace our sovereignty and the reason why i put it in there is because we are almost pathetic in our knee-jerk automated hyperbolic

1:35 desperation for external validation okay pathetic pathetic okay um and why is this this is because this is how we were conditioned not only are we natural nurturers that's part of our emotional biological dna but it's because we were trained that knowing the other serving the other uh understanding the other is

2:05 more powerful more vital more purposeful than honoring and validating and understanding ourselves we've literally if this is ourself and we were supposed to go down this path to understand ourselves to honor who it is we are we literally have gone this way okay opposite way not even here where we could meet completely opposite we've shut this down and gone the other way so imagine imagine the consequences

2:39 right if we were at least parallel or close by or planning to meet the self wow what a different life we would have led now this is not to enter regret or reminisce about missed opportunities you know i'm never about living in the past we're here now we're here now we're here now but the now is informed by the past we must understand the past but not to live in the past

3:11 we must understand the past in order to understand how the if we got here so that we're not like oh how did i get here must be the evil other person must be my mother-in-law must be my damn child so we understand the past to understand hello you were part of every moment at least after the age of 22 25 and that's how you got here you could have changed your path at 26 27 28 no i didn't so that's how i got

3:43 here so we understand the past not to live in it not to drown in it not to romanticize it okay don't do that not to have nostalgia oh remember those days when we used to walk together holding hands no stop it you're here now because right after you walked holding hands you had a big ass fight okay so so we are not remembering the past for

4:14 nostalgia or another escape of bypassing the pain of the present moment we're remembering the past only to understand the present so we have been historically raised to forget ourselves so the self is here we are going here okay opposite way and because of that we have not only lost to it as we are there have been disastrous consequences because of

4:46 it okay but again i'm not saying this to induce regret i know i'm sounding like like do you understand what you have done do you understand how much time we've wasted do you understand what's at stake here but have no regret i know i know i'm just like i'm making you feel so bad and then you're i'm like no but don't regret this is not about being guilty you know you i i have a friend who does this you know so she'll she'll

5:13 be like you do understand that you know you just traumatized your child but don't feel bad i do this in all my lectures actually actually the friendlies me okay so given that we've all led disastrously unconscious lives and gone the opposite way now we have to chop chop change it around okay so that's why i write in this chapter of embracing sovereignty to embrace the queen energy so i start this

5:43 chapter by saying for years she lived behind cowardly shadows afraid to ruffle their feathers and anger them tiptoeing she learned to walk with stealth and quiet until one day something changed and she no longer feared them it was here that the maid morphed into the queen aha that's what i'm talking about when the maid morphs into the queen

6:15 okay so what that means is not that you're some raving lunatic although nothing wrong with that frankly but that you are understanding that all these years that you sidestepped who you were pretending like oh i don't exist you know literally we act like that like i don't exist i don't need to eat i don't need friends you know i was raised in a culture where which i love by the way and if my mother stops doing this in case she

6:46 hears this i'll be really upset so mom don't listen to this she in my culture the women at least in her generation i think it's ended with me uh in her generation and beyond they don't sit at the table till everyone eats okay so we get hot food you know the big puris that you make in india now you can only eat them hot that's why i don't want my mother to suddenly radically awaken okay this is

7:13 not for you mom it's too late for you so you get like hot food and hot so the idea that i would even ask my mother to sit at the table it was was not even conceivable her role was to make me hot puris okay so i'm joking here but really it's so pathetic but we so loved it so it's like a double edged sword but um it's it's the idea that she doesn't exist you know she doesn't need to eat and we

7:44 all were okay with it but like it's okay you can eat later we need to eat hot puris okay and all mothers that i was raised around they come to the table oh no and you know what they say oh we get happiness from watching you eating they're not eating the leftovers because they made so much food there's enough for them but they're eating later all the fat children eat first okay and the fat husbands so i'm just generically stereotyping but

8:13 it happens a lot so what i'm trying to say people is the mentality that i don't exist right so well you may not have been raised in india and don't be thinking that you're so superior like you're not like those typical indian women all you western women have some patheticism as well okay which shocked me because i'm thinking western women can't be pathetic but they are in their own way right so in your own way you are okay you may not just be in

8:43 such a blatantly ridiculous way like we indian women are but in your own way you are okay so because we have decided that we don't exist now we need to work even harder to at least sit at the table right i'm not saying go sit at the head i'm not saying burn the table down i'm not saying tell everybody vamos vamos it's my turn only me at the table but can we at least sit at the damn

9:10 table right so we have to put ourselves there we have to place ourselves at the table nobody is going to give us oh what do you think and then wait for our answer you know we need to assert we need to claim we need to own we need to be present to ourselves for years of having abdicated our power absconded and divorced our control over

9:41 our own destiny it is now all the more imperative that we understand there is no benefit to doing that crap except raising entitled fat little apathetic lazy children okay like there is no benefit to that okay yes you know we saw that my mom oh you're such a good cook and you're so nice do you really want to be called nice like you want that on your tombstone she was nice no really you know today i was in a podcast with

10:12 kate northrup my dear friend and she had the audacity to tell me you're not nice and i was like she's right but for years i played to the tune and wanted the trophy of the nicest girl in the world right you do too it's in a subconscious okay so our reconditioning our new way has to be to burn that tombstone to

10:43 dismantle it to crush it the tombstone that says she died so nice she died such a nice woman she her life was to be the nicest woman burn it kill it destroy it you don't want to be nice because what nice means really at the core and it's in my book niceness is putting other people first you can be kind you can be generous you can be compassionate but nice what is

11:13 nice nice is when other people call you nice for what what is being nice being sweet what is being sweet is not ruffling feathers is not pissing people off right so you need to understand that you are attached to this idea of being nice you are attached to being the good girl you are attached to pretending as if other people come first actually if you think about it it's ridiculous

11:45 right that other people come before this being who's in charge of this being who does this body count on it counts on this mind who does this mind count on this mind this heart who does this heart count on our consciousness who do you think is going to take care of this if not you your parents you saw what a bad job they did of that already they couldn't do much

12:16 your partner okay your partner can be lovely but they cannot fix you they cannot heal you they cannot take care of this this can only be taken care of by you so if you're taking care of everyone else beautifully or trying really hard but not taking care of yourself you are lying you are betraying you are enacting a great act of war against yourself because this is your first

12:47 responsibility this now along with this can be 10 other people but this has to be on the table so this is what it's called to enter your sovereign power to understand that the love we get from ourselves i write in my book a radical awakening the love we get from ourselves is more valuable than the love we receive from another this is key the feeling we get when we honor ourselves needs to be more of a bejeweled treasure

13:20 than the feeling we get when another honors us when we arrive at the place where our own self-approval and self-validation matter more than that of others we turn to ourselves for guidance for wise counsel instead of calling a friend we call on our inner self when we are sad we accompany ourselves on a journey inward to discover the reason when we are happy we celebrate ourselves and experience great inner pride without the need for outer

13:51 approval when i speak of the queen i speak of the awakened queen one who works from her heart as well as from her mind she's the archetype of a woman who is no longer apologetic about her inner right to take up space and hold court she is no longer ambivalent about her capacity to contribute and make a difference she is no longer afraid to shine she is fully and irrevocably aware of her worth and no

14:22 longer cowers in the shadows afraid to display herself as boldly as she desires when we remember our own true worth by channeling our inner queen we are able to separate who we are from another's beliefs about us this stepping into worth is a key ingredient in our growth it is what the

14:53 queen does with ease so this is what we're talking about a queen entering into your queen power entering into your queen energy what that means why it's so important especially for us women because we've spent years in a fog acting like our virtue is to put other people first acting as if that that is a sacredly noble thing to do when it's actually just bs conditioning

15:26 it's a conditioned way to be it's not true there are no points in wherever you're going in the afterlife for being nice no there are great points in the present moment for being authentic so what are you going to be what do you want on your tombstone if you have one she was nice or she lived her life her way authentically to the fullest decide how you want to live your life and bring it into the present moment

15:59 this is the moment where the future begins to manifest itself there is no future everything is happening right now okay everyone thank you for joining my book love i'll see you when i see you we were talking about a radical awakening buy it for your sisters