Transcript
0:00 influencer culture that celebrates this authenticity completely forgets accountability. It doesn't ever say, "Yeah, but what if I am in the wrong? What if I'm the a-hole? What if I made a mistake?" There's no accountability to say, "Wait, what? What am I contributing to this situation? How have I co-created this? How can I change it?" And the truth is that if you're always saying, "But it's my authentic self, my it's my authentic self." You're stuck because if that's just who you are, if that's just the real you, what are you going to do about it? If the real me is someone who's always late, who forgets things, who doesn't meet her own standards, who doesn't have any self-discipline, who can't handle any kind of critique or feedback, who gets triggered and breaks her Lego, her son's Lego spaceship, then my authentic self sucks. I don't want to be her, but I have to accept my authentic self according to this culture. And so then I am completely stuck. Right? The message becomes nothing is your fault. Don't blame yourself. Don't have a culture of blame. That's shaming. Don't shame yourself. Shaming yourself is detrimental. It's damaging. And therefore, you stay stagnant because why grow if I'm perfect as I am? Everybody else should shift. The world should shape ship shape shape shift to fit me.
1:14 It's like, oh, how many narcissists does it take to change a light bulb? One, they stand in place and the world revolves around them, right? And that's what this culture, this meme me culture, this selfie culture, this authentic self, just accepting you're fine how you are. You're doing your best, sweetie. Don't try harder. Give up. That's what they're really saying. It sounds like love, but it's really saying give up. If you radically authentically accept your misbehaving child who's mistreating others, who's mistreating themselves, who's not learning any life skills, you're basically saying, I don't believe you could do better than this. I don't believe you could rise above this. I don't believe that you can change. I don't believe in a growth mindset or in brain plasticity or in your capacity to overcome struggles. No, you're going to stay stuck like this. Okay. So, it talks you out of becoming the woman that you actually want to be.
Summary
- Influencer culture promotes a version of authenticity that discourages accountability.
- Individuals are encouraged to accept their flaws without questioning their impact on others or the situation.
- This mindset can lead to stagnation, as it implies there's no need for personal growth or change.
- The culture fosters a sense of entitlement, where individuals expect the world to adapt to them.
- Accepting negative behaviors in oneself or others can hinder development and learning.
- The message often conveyed is that striving for improvement is unnecessary, which can be detrimental.
- Emphasizing unconditional acceptance may undermine the belief in personal potential and growth.