Ask me anything! Live Q&A with Jason | Dad University

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1:10 [Music] so we're starting but I can't see and we're live all right bear with me as uh I figure this out we have uh some new technical aspects to the show we're trying to do a live show and so we're working out the Kinks so appreciate anybody you know or everybody's patience with that

1:40 um Cowboy you're right we are live and uh hey Mark good to see you um Mark asks what do you think of what do you think about Eckhart toll um I only wish that I could be as calm and um mindful as uh Mr toll yeah I've watched some of his videos I think it's quite interesting you know it's certainly self uh reflective um a lot of it is very similar to Saad

2:13 Guru which I watched some of his videos so yeah I I I think it's good I mean here's what I will say about anything like that I think that if you are getting benefit from it it's good you know I don't think that everybody has to have the same beliefs in the same philosophies but I like what he I like what he says um like I said I wish he was I was that calm you know the ability to remain uh

2:39 calm in situations and patience and just his demeanor um you know for some people it could be a little slow but uh I strive for that just because mine is the complete opposite you know I I operate on a very fast paced high frequency you know and sometimes that shows in these videos maybe sometimes it doesn't um but I'm the same in these videos that I am in real life whether that's good or bad um so yeah I I like them though overall

3:11 so if you're just joining us here throw some questions in the chat let me know where you are joining us from uh do we have our Tick Tock going as well Tick Tock uh welcome if you've got questions please throw them in the chat there as well and we'll try to get to them um but I'm here to answer questions and that's the format at least for today you know we're we're looking and we're looking at and exploring different

3:38 formats for this live show whether we want to have guests and whether we want to just answer questions but as people have questions I'm happy to answer them if I can um certainly there are questions that I can't answer um for everybody in the audience how is the sound uh and the quality of the video we are looking at that we we had some issues yesterday we went live yesterday as well and uh looks like some

4:04 of those things are resolved it sounded um at least it seemed like the sound was okay and the video was doing better than it did before so as I look over here a lot it's because I'm looking at my laptop and looking at the engagement and questions and things so don't want anyone to think that I'm not paying attention or that I'm distracted if anything I'm just looking at my laptop

4:35 so in fact it's not on camera but see here we can do that that's right here um which is funny that there's this delay so I can see that I can see myself doing something a little bit uh later after it does it so if you guys have questions throw them in the chat I'm happy to to um you know to answer anything nothing nothing going on Tick Tock yet we're getting there starting to come in

5:05 so let's see let me see if I can figure out a different topic or a unique topic to talk about um if you're not familiar we do have our membership um we have been working hard on that there's some new community features which allows you to chat with others posts ask questions as well as with me and to interact with everybody in the community if you are interested in that go to daduniversity.com foreign

5:35 other than that uh trying to think what else is going to be happening in the New Year the oh we can show it on the screen let's show the let's show the website on the screen we can do that now we've got some fancy technical capabilities that we've been working on so let's bring that up I have a delay here so I can't exactly see it when you do it because what you had it briefly you're moving the

6:03 frames around foreign we're just experimenting there we go now it's up so you can show the website um and then also click on the become a member if you can and um thanks for everybody's patience

6:34 we're just trying to get all these things worked out it's hard to work out technical details behind the scenes when you're doing a live stream because you can't do and work out the Kinks without actually doing a live stream so then it sends out notifications to everybody and everybody's on and everybody sees it so you get to actually see it in process because otherwise we would do all the stuff behind the scenes like when we make videos and we

7:01 do other things nobody sees all that so it's a little bit different um but yeah so one of the features of the membership is pay what feels good so what that means is you get to choose how much you want to pay [Music] um and that's a that's a special thing here is that you can choose as low as three dollars a month up to 149 a month so you get to choose you determine how valuable it is to you

7:31 we know it's valuable you get courses you get online chats you get the Forum you get a huge Archive of videos um all available for everybody so how are we on the technical side Luke we're doing good lighting sound everything's good all right

8:05 we got some questions instead of punishment how can we go about teaching our kids what not to do so somebody on Tick Tock asks instead of punishment um how can we go about teaching our kids what not to do well you actually said it right there and so like in our house we do not have punishment um in the in the general sense where you know somebody gets grounded or sent to their

8:35 room or something like that and and the reason that that has worked is because it's years of discussions in other words there might be some penalties sometimes where like you've provided a warning of some kind um but one of the things that I think parents don't take into consideration is that they're punishing a child often for something that the child isn't aware of or the child didn't know what the boundaries were so I'll give you an

9:07 example you know you've never really had the conversation that the child shouldn't take something from the neighbor's yard you know we know that that's bad we know that that could be considered stealing but you haven't really you know it's a young child you haven't really had that conversation you haven't dove into that and they don't really understand it and so the child takes something from the yard and then you punish the child you ground them or you take something away

9:35 or whatever so the difficulty with that is that you know in my world and how we've parented my wife and I is that um we haven't told the child or taught the child anything in order for them to understand that that was the wrong thing to do now sometimes the child will know that it's the wrong thing to do and then choose to do it anyways and so then you may have to you feel like you have to

10:01 have some sort of consequence for that [Music] um a lot of times what you have to realize is that the punishment doesn't really fix anything the you know providing a punishment of like okay well you don't get to go on your iPad or you don't get you know all that's doing is going to make the the child better at hiding a situation or lying or anything else so we talk about it and we talk about those

10:29 kinds of situations so you know it it's probably easier if I had a very specific situation that you could explain but you know I'll give you an example a child does something wrong most of the time let's say it's at school well the school is going to punish them let the school punish them you don't necessarily have additional punishment at home um so but here's the thing with this is that there's no punishment but there's also no rewards in other words

10:58 you know the punishment and rewards don't make sense because they don't necessarily change Behavior long term and don't change the feeling inside of whether something is right or wrong the reason let's say that a child should not do something to another person or affect somebody else is because it's not okay to do so not because they're going to get in trouble um yes people argue all the time there's laws

11:29 there's um uh uh you know there's things that are in place for that but the reasons you don't do it is because it's wrong or you don't do something is because it's wrong immoral uh affects somebody else not because you're going to get in trouble um you know I don't go out and shoot somebody because I'm worried that I'm gonna go to jail it's I don't go and shoot somebody because that's the wrong it's going to

12:01 hurt somebody and so we are teaching our children about like right and wrong being moral and such and so that's where I think that comes into play I hope that helps um here's some additional questions coming up um I think I was asked this Nader asked this about you know one-year-old twin girls indoor activities I think you asked this yesterday and I don't know if I answered that I must have not because you're answering you're asking the question again

12:29 um I yeah and I think I said the same thing I'll or I'll say the same thing reading um you know any kind of you know they're they're one year old so you can only do so many things um you know it depends on their interaction and their cognitive abilities so you can read together you could possibly color you could play with um you know various things within your hands and dexterity you can teach them

12:59 um you know differences between things you can play hide and seek you could play uh different emotions you know there's there's like you know putting up a smile face and then doing the smile and saying the word smile you can start to teach them things like numbers and alphabets and things like that so I hope that helps um there's so many so many things that you can do you know you try to avoid video you try to avoid the iPad you try

13:27 to do it sometimes that can be entertaining or it can be educational I understand um nasima asks can you shed some light on how to handle Tantrums of a toddler school going toddler um well one I'd you know first say it I think I I asked this or was asked this yesterday so Tantrums are um their way of responding and not knowing

13:59 how to handle a situation you know um I mean adults throw Tantrums too adults get you know angry and throw things or yell or slam a door or whatever that can be considered a tantrum and most of that comes because we don't know how to handle our emotions so the first thing about your toddler is accept the fact that they are a toddler and they are they don't know how to express their emotions they are feeling something and

14:22 so a tantrum is basically the expression of that emotion so we need to teach them how to properly Express their emotions and how to help them understand what it is that they're feeling or going through you know a tantrum is often mixed in sometimes with whining and I feel there's like there's a you kind of have to differentiate that you know a tantrum can be an emotional response to a situation I don't want to leave the park

14:51 I want that ice cream or the cookie and I'm not getting it um you know and so part of it is understanding why the child is throwing that tantrum and then you know doing the best thing you can do is doing steps beforehand so that the Tantrum doesn't happen and so those are being good at transitions it's communicating with the child well it's understanding and redirection maybe when they're about to do something you change direction and do

15:18 something else so you kind of have to know your child and so I would look more to avoiding the Tantrums versus how to handle the Tantrum when a child is in the middle of a tantrum they say like their lid is flipped you can't really be very rational you can allow them to go through their emotions let them stop let them be there the one key for you is not to get upset yourself do not take it personally do not allow

15:49 their tantrum to ruin your day or make you feel crazy or make you feel upset look at them with a little bit more empathy and say okay my child is feeling something right now they don't know how to handle this situation they are having a tantrum and just that difference will help you deal with it in a better way and A Better Way meaning more calm so that's probably my best advice on quick on the quick I would say also make

16:23 sure that um I have a video on tantrums and that gives you some tips about what to do beforehand and then also how to handle it but just keep it in mind that like your child is two three four five years old whatever they are if they're throwing a tantrum it means that they don't know how to properly Express their emotions in a way that we can and understand but adults throw Tantrums too and that just means when you see an adult flip

16:49 out slam something throw something get angry yell at somebody else what do you typically think you're like whoa that person doesn't really handle themselves very well so why would we expect that a two three four-year-old is able to do that when a ton of adults can't do it so I think if you just um take it that way you'll probably do a little bit easier um let's see Ricardo what's your views on circumcision

17:19 um I think that's an individual decision um I think it is you know there is for and against there is um I don't think I don't I don't know that my personal view matters um there are people that do it for religious reasons there are people that will do it because Dad has it a certain way and so the child will be able to look and see if the dad matches you know Sun matches the dad

17:46 um I I don't necessarily have a strong view either way I I think that that's a completely individual decision um you know and and I think um yeah I I think that's up to up to the individual um all right Kurt how do you deal with anxiety of having a newborn um expected nervous of no sleep and how to deal with working too um

18:16 okay so anxiety you know and people react or have different feelings about anxiety but it here's the one thing I will say is that it's totally normal so get yourself there first that you know you're not strange you're not weird you're not there's nothing wrong with you having anxiety about your child coming is a totally normal thing that almost everybody experiences if they say that they don't they're usually lying so that's the first thing and that usually

18:42 helps you feel better because you're not alone how do you deal with it I think a lot of times anxiety comes from the unknown um and so for for many people studying it talking to others you know going online watching videos um you know as I said talking about it practicing creating sort of scheduling preparing those are things that can possibly reduce the anxiety you know the

19:12 anxiety I'm guessing I'm just making a guess here because we're we don't have a lot of um area to discuss it but you know you might have you said you have anxiety about not being able to sleep you have um how to figure out work I think part of it is just accepting the fact that your life is changing a little bit you will be okay you are just going to need to learn to adjust and and do

19:38 those things accordingly so you know I'm here everybody else is here it's like we've all survived um you know we're happy to be fathers and excited about it so you know the end result is you'll be okay um but it's also okay to have that anxiety and the way that you deal with it you know take care of yourself you know eat well get lots of sleep now exercise you know do things to take care of yourself and then I think

20:06 specifically learn what you can and that will probably help reduce the anxiety hopefully that helps let me know in the chat if that if that did um like so Kurt where can you get a dad University hoodie perfect it's right here I do have them I do sell them um you can go to daduniversity.com and click on merchandise and the hoodies are sold there I will tell you that if you are a member

20:39 um which you can pay what feels good to be a member and so you can choose your price there is a member discount code inside the membership so if you're a member you get that discount code so that could be valuable to you which you you know if you choose some of the lower amounts you will save more than that on the discount code I'm just giving you a little bit of a hint um

21:09 all right let's see here Rosie my four-year-old daughter whines for everything even when she's talking it's in a whiny voice and now my two-year-old is doing the same thing what's the way the best way to get them out of that habit um so my children were both whiners as well and and the voice was whining and so I one of the things that we did was we've practiced regular voice I

21:42 don't want to say big boy Voice or big girl Voice or anything like that um maybe we call it whiny voice and regular voice and or normal voice or whatever and basically is is talk with them in the you know when they're calm when they're not in a situation and explain what those voices are and you know if the part of it is just because it's annoying to you you know it feels like they're a little baby and they're whining and such

22:12 um so what you can do is just remind them and say Hey listen I'm going to only respond when you ask me in a normal voice um you know that could be a little harsh but you know they what we used to do too is when the child would whine we would say try again and eventually like they understood it so they might say I want to go to the store or whatever we'd say try again and

22:38 they say mom can we please go to the store and so we gave them the ability by just saying try again try again try again and we said it nicely and eventually they get it I mean they grow out of that sort of whiny phase but I remember it going into sometimes even like six years old five six years old um not constant but they would still have that wine voice so I think that that's what you you could do you could

23:05 establish the wine voice and the non-voying non-winding voice and even ask them say hey what's that whining voice you do and they're like what you know and say you know when you have your height you don't explain to them and show them and say Hey listen that's not a voice that we're going to use when we're asking for something or even that we need to use there's no reason to use that voice we're going to use our regular voice and and so when

23:31 they do it they whine just say try again and they're like you know ask me in a regular voice that's all you can really do um let's see H Court Cortez just found out that I'm going to be a dad this week well congratulations what would you suggest would be one of the most important things to prep for the baby's eventual arrival well here's the first thing is that you probably have seven months or six months or whatever so you got some

24:03 time um one of the most important things to prep make as much money as you can now I mean it's not really a joke it's um work extra get extra sleep take care of yourself health-wise um support your spouse or significant other or partner however you categorize them um that's what I can say those are that's

24:36 probably four or five things but those are all good uh Renee my wife's expecting in June babies from a donor I've been running through scenarios in my head ever since she got pregnant that you're not my real dad any advice or things I should expect um that's a great question um I'm a little stumped there because I have not been in that situation so let me think about how I would like to handle that that's kind of how I do

25:04 things so this is not like expert advice because I'm I'm not you know I haven't had this situation personally and I typically like to talk from my own personal experience um there's probably I'm guessing there's probably articles and especially even where you got the don't where you know you went through the donor program or where you got this that there's probably literature and such about this and I would probably

25:36 there's probably ways to um handle that that are more psychologically based in other words you know therapists who have either you know created documentation on that and ways to do that but I wouldn't I couldn't imagine that that if that ever happened that wouldn't happen for years um you know the child unless the child

26:09 looks drastically different is that something that you even plan to disclose um you know that's a choice between you know your partner and you of whether you even disclose that information and do they have to know that I mean you know parents all the time or their kids look totally different than their parents um you know there doesn't have to be an executive it's funny somebody said the other day um it was it was actually this was not the

26:39 other day this was like a couple years ago but somebody had said to my wife wow you look so much like your father it's her stepfather she's not even blood related and so it was just funny how people will um you know can say things and interpret things and whatever so I I think it's up to you um you know if if it's a sensitive subject for you then you know that's what you have to discuss but I wouldn't imagine

27:06 there's a real reason to even have to disclose that and you know if they come to you with that question why aren't you the real I mean you are their father so yeah I mean I I would probably venture to say to to reach out to the the you know the sources or the resources of where you had that process done and such and and get that information from there but that you know I empathize with you I mean I

27:34 understand that you know that's a concern of yours I just um I'm not sure how I would handle that but I appreciate that sometimes I don't have the I don't have the answers I I definitely and this is I I say this a lot um you know of course it's Dad University I get a ton of questions about babies and and dads and stuff but I consider myself more my own set of of a dad expert versus a baby and child

28:02 expert and if that makes sense so you know because I can only speak to the types of things that I have knowledge of you know and people will ask me questions about um you know medical situations and um sleep situations and like this a unique situation in which you know you have a donor like I'm not an expert in those areas at all the only thing I'm an expert at is me and my experience that's how I consider

28:30 myself an expert and the things that I became an expert on are you know going through my own process of you know being scared and fearful as a father going to calm and more confident and having a good relationship with my children and so that's the process of like how did I do that what did I do for myself you know I meditate I practice gratitude I practice patience I take care of myself it's I try to get good

29:02 sleep there's all these things that I do in there for me you know things like handling a tantrum dealing with the baby's situation those are you know there's a lot of different philosophies on those I mean I have my own um but it's like anything it's like I I'm not necessarily always right it's right for me um so it's interesting I mean because people will often um ask the questions that you know if I

29:33 don't know the answer I'll tell you I don't know the answer and so um all right get back to the questions they're coming in um everyone's having some good feedback I uh uh x86 good to see you and say hi to Paisley Paisley High um I hope you enjoy the watching uh let's see Vic fit my baby is two months old she sleeps really well at night when my wife puts her to bed I try to do the same routine when my wife

30:04 isn't home and my baby just won't sleep unless she cries herself to sleep um I think that that's time that's Comfort um often times I can tell you like my son when we first got you know had our child my son didn't want to hang out with me like he would cry he didn't he wouldn't let me give him a bath and part of that was I just didn't spend as much time with him as mom did

30:25 and eventually that subsided and what it was is just doing it more you know um there I don't know that there aren't specific tricks and and especially when you say it in that way it's like it'd be different if your child was having the problem with both of you but it if it is with you it is simply could be just a comfort thing um and that I don't take it personally that is totally normal you know a child

30:51 is comfortable typically with who they spend the most time with that's just what happens and um you know for the for initial period my wife was at home and spending more time with the kids and or you know worked a little bit and then worked more you know so it's like I just had to try to spend more time and so maybe it's have more planned nights where you put the child down you know and do that routinely so that the child

31:18 just becomes more comfortable with that as well it's repetition is typically the best you know that's what a child gets comfortable with so I would say that um also too let me know where you are uh joining us from um let me know like your city and state I always like seeing where people are from I appreciate that and um any other question or let me sift through here any questions from Tick Tock we have Tick Tock going as well

31:48 um let's see Vic fit Las Vegas right on I love Vegas um Denton Texas Renee cool I love Texas also I mean I'm I'm from San Diego or North San Diego so you know it is hard because what we try not to tell people how wonderful it is here because everybody moves here but um it's expensive

32:18 um but it's beautiful and um you know just the other day we were able to drive two hours to the snow and I can go to the beach in five minutes so it's it's pretty handy H Cortez Fort Myers oh cool you live in San Diego right on oh yeah I should have local meetups around around the country we could all meet up when I have a larger audience maybe I can do that right now I would do

32:46 it and maybe one person would show up per City if I choose a major city um also too you know and if you guys have things that you like to see more of um you know we're looking for that in 2023 of you know feedback from um from people of the types of videos they like to see the types of content they like to see and that's really helpful you know because although I do look at what people want

33:14 it's great to hear that more often um a lot of it is I have to go by what I think people want you know and that that's you know sometimes I'm right sometimes I'm wrong but you know I I can do a video about it's funny I can do a video about something that I think is really really important I do a video about empathy or gratitude or patience or something like that not that many people watch it not that

33:39 many people care um and then I can just do you know how to hold a baby or baby tips on something and you know it it goes crazy and so you know that obviously gives me an indication of what people want so what people want and what I think is important is sometimes different and so that's what we try to differentiate here and figure out um let's see got a couple more minutes um

34:10 again for those of you just joining if you are not familiar with our um membership it's a great way to support the show and support the lives and support the channel is through the membership and you can pay what feels good um you know I spend my time I have got we have a you know full-time videographer here Luke and um we we put these videos together it's a lot of work it's a lot of effort a lot of time and

34:39 so we appreciate you know the fact is that you know the membership helps support these kinds of things and I plan on and wanting to do these videos regularly or these lives and um we do that through the support of everybody so I'll be adding some things where people can um you know people can help support but for now the membership is it and you can go to the website daduniversity.com click on become a member and choose an

35:09 amount that you feel uh comfortable with and that's it you can help help support the show so we really appreciate that um Renee I recently found your channel so recommendations for products like diaper bags and such um yeah I I haven't done too much on like product reviews and the reason being is because I'm a very minimalistic guy when it comes to the baby products

35:41 um I have felt that there was complete Overkill over purchasing overselling of baby products and I think it's a very vulnerable time for parents or you know the at the time and and it's unfortunate because I think people are sort of scared and tricked and convinced that they need all of these things when the fact is is that you really don't there are some things that are certainly convenient um but that's got I've kind of shied a

36:13 wave I get a lot of inquiries from product companies from strollers to bibs to bottles to things like that and um it just hasn't been something I have yet explored into I I will never say never um because I have to you know I have to find products that I really believe in but you know I mean things like a bottle or a bib you know might be a requirement but you know other than that there's

36:42 like like toys and things like that um I just you know didn't think I needed them um Renee asks what would you say is the one thing that you for sure did not need a bottle warmer a monitor um three strollers we only needed one we didn't need a separate one for this and a different one for that and a mobile for this um three different changing stations

37:13 you know one for this part of the house one for this part of the house one but like it's convenient but it all racks up it's all expensive you know um you know instead of people buying you all these things have them buy diapers if you're going to use diapers um you know I I just think that there was I mean yeah I mean like the amount we were lucky from a clothing standpoint because we had other people that had had

37:38 chill just had children and so we had a tremendous amount of clothing donated and given our way and before that I did not think I always just thought my children oh yeah we'll buy the product once my children were born I realized how valuable hand-me-downs are because they will spit up on stuff ruin it it gets dirty it gets lost it's whatever so we had so much hand-me-downs that it was great and um I have a video

38:09 about that too about like how to save money how to get hand-me-downs from Neighbors and friends and family and family and just you know asking for that stuff Carlos great question what are some of the realities or challenges about being a new parent that people don't usually talk about I think one of the biggest ones is that you will doubt yourself um I don't think men talk about this very much I think women may be a little

38:41 bit more open but you will doubt yourself as a parent a lot um you know as much as I know I'm putting a tremendous amount of effort towards my parenting I have doubted myself many many times like you know oh did I do the right decision oh was I making enough effort did I spend enough time did I tell him the right thing or did I do this right for her um and so I you know that is a challenge

39:11 you have to give yourself a little bit of Grace and um you know um yeah it's it's like um you have to just give yourself that that you're going to make mistakes you um you really have to give yourself some compassion that parenting is not easy and I think that's one of probably the biggest challenges that

39:41 you just you feel sometimes like a failure or you feel like you have failed and as a father that can come in all kinds of things and and it can come as the fact as you feel like you're not making enough money you know you feel like you're not providing enough as we always off or often think you know we have to provide and as a result of that providing you're not present enough because you're always at work or you

40:05 know you're not you know when you are home you're exhausted and you're tired and the last thing you want to do is go play something or you know you want some time to yourself so I mean I can go on there's a lot um I think a lot of the challenges are the things that I talk about and I have you know courses uh you know many many courses about that I have work-life Harmony I have the myths about

40:29 fatherhood I mean these are all courses in the membership that talk about all these things and the challenges that we go through and so those are the topics that I I tackle a lot and um I think that that's um those are probably some things to hit [Music] um nibs checks oh you call yourself that but your name is Salvador when a newborn cries is there like a checklist that you normally go through

41:00 like check diaper check of hungry then hug him and then call the doctor if nothing again um yeah I mean you go through a mental checklist there's only a couple things you know when a child is crying they are either hungry tired need to be changed or want your attention there's really those four things um and so you are uncomfortable and so yeah you look you look for those things so there's not a huge checklist but you

41:27 know and you get to know your baby fairly well and you say oh that sounds like you know that's a cry for that they're tired you know or that's a cry that they just want attention or you know oh wow they're hungry you know um so that those are sort of things but I you know so maybe it's just a mental checklist but there's not anything specific that I've created but that might be good um an anti-purl thank you very much

41:57 um thank you for watching I appreciate you for watching so um your daughter is one how do you gay get them involved with a sport or something um well you've got some time um but I think you know one of the things I will say is that children often no it's not going to be for sure but children often gravitate to you know what their parents or their family does so I'll give you a good example my

42:28 um my wife and I are Avid exercise people we lift weights do yoga do other things and so we in our house have always had a little area whether you call it a gym or whatever I've always had a little area where we exercise and it's been a part of our Lives since the beginning we had since we had our children we would trade off time where you know when we went to the gym or then other times where we

42:55 worked out of the house whatever and so our children have been around that their entire lives my son who's now 14 I go to the gym he comes to the gym with me and he does that and enjoys it now he's even going sometimes on his own it's a part of him that you know he had the ability to see he and he saw it he got a chance to try it and so he did it

43:20 so you know that's one thing and and you know when he was really little he's he we have pictures him trying to do pull-ups and trying to do things when you know he was really little because that's what we were doing then on the other side it's just as a parent you put them in a bunch of different things and you see what they like you know you may have an affinity for a certain sport or maybe you like

43:43 music or maybe you like art or maybe you like something and so you expose them to that but that doesn't mean they're going to do it and so you have to be okay with that also is that you know your child is a unique individual so you might um you know lead them to do something and try something but you know you can't force it upon them if they're not going to enjoy it so I think you just expose

44:08 them to a lot of different things you let them try different things and you see what they like and they will come around but you know as a family if you are somebody as an example like you know you always go skiing snow skiing and so you know even at a little young age you bring them they you put on the skis you do it and you have them ski or you like to surf or you play a guitar or you know

44:30 all of those things are exposure based on the fact that you enjoy doing them so I think it's important that if you do enjoy different things bring your kids along with you allow them to experience it with you and um that's that's what I can say about that [Music] um well you ask what is too much involvement or being pushy about it yeah I mean I I think it's pushing them when they're not interested my children have

44:56 been in martial arts for now almost I think seven years and I have said repeatedly to them if you are not interested in it and you don't enjoy it don't do it I mean I don't need the extra cost I want to support them because they enjoy it and so you know there's been a couple times where in the earlier days where they were on the brink of not wanting to do it or they weren't sure and so we said okay

45:24 you know I'm not going to fight you on it you don't want to do it then fine um you know there is something to be said if they try something to stick it out for the at least the season or at least the you know whatever the the situation is but as far as putting them in something that they don't enjoy yeah I mean that's where you get too pushy um you know other than saying something

45:47 to the effect is like I don't care what you do but I want you to be active in some way you know I don't care if you like to run if you like to play outside or you like to play with a ball or something but being active is healthy and it's important or if you know music is really important to you then maybe you have to try to find a couple different instruments and see if they

46:08 like anything now if they don't can't really I don't think it's worth it to force them um they have to find their own path so don't push it um all right we are out of time here actually I went past a little bit uh what I thought um but thank you everybody uh be sure to subscribe to the channel click the notification Bell so that if we do these lives you get notified um because we're going to be doing some

46:38 more of these and so if you click on the uh the subscribe and the notification Bell you will get notified that when we go live and so I want to make sure that everybody gets notified of that and then if you like I said you want to support the channel support dad University go to daduniversity.com become a member pay what feels good to you anything is appreciated so with that just want to say thank you to everybody

47:04 for supporting us and being here and um I will see you again soon take care foreign