Broken Parents Make Broken Children | Mansi Zaveri's Speech at @SRMD with Pujya Gurudev Shree

0:06 Last week I had the honor of speaking at the srm, the Quest of Happiness event at NCPA in front of a room full of educators, entrepreneurs, creators, most importantly children and of course Poojia Gurudev Shree.

0:20 You know the first thing I did, I chat gpd. What is divine tag. But I think it's so difficult for ChatGPT to explain or define what can only be felt.

0:32 Why conversations around childhood connection and conscious parenting need bigger stages and braver voices.

0:38 Life is the most easy exam, but many fail because we try to copy others not realizing that each one of us have a different question paper.

0:47 Here's a humble request that I made to Gurudev.

0:50 I think you're doing a brilliant job of raising conscious kids. And I'm on the other extreme trying to raise conscious kids. Parents.

0:58 It was my absolute honor to share the stage with Gurudev himself. Someone whose vision has touched thousands of families and inspires each one of us today.

1:08 First thing I did, I chat GPT like a modern overwhelmed parent. What is divine touch? And I'm a parent to a 17 and 13 year old. So they're like mom, why don't you just see what it is? And then I did. But I think it's so difficult for ChatGPT to explain or define what can only be felt. Yeah, I mean the graciousness, the kindness, the non ego of each of the volunteer. I have spoken in the last five, eight, ten days to hearing you speak sir, it was an honor and I truly believe I am a product of every story that I've managed to share on kidstop Press.

1:51 And I think you have shared with me such amazing stories. But I have to say that after the kids. So first I had to hear him speak. So I was like okay dude, how am I going to do this? How am I going to do this? Then I had to see the children perform. That was next level. So I was like yeah, to fill so but I'm going to keep it short, I promise you guys. But I remember one quote that is actually guiding me like with immense clarity right now, which is actually by SRD which he says life is the most easy exam.

2:27 But many fail because we try to copy others not realizing that each one of us have a different question paper. But we are constantly worried about the other person not looking within us. Right. You mentioned about the ski slopes and failing and you know I'm a student of yoga. If you guys follow me on Instagram, you all have seen lots of falls. I've cut my lips trying to do balancing and handstands and all of that. And the first thing my teacher taught me was, Mansi, let go of the fear of falling.

2:58 Because when you let go of the fear of falling, that's the only time you will be able to rise up again. And to me, your complete handstand makes no difference if you have not let go of that fear of falling. For me, my win as a teacher is not you doing the handstand, but you being able to get back up, come back to class the next day, leaving your ego on the doorstep and saying, I am here to learn.

3:25 So my true title, with all these fancy things that people have said, is punching back to my teenagers because I think they need it. Apprentice for life and a fabulous storyteller. And I'm just going to leave you with two beautiful things. I've had the privilege of interviewing many, many great people. And I think I'm going to say one thing, which is I think what Nainish said as well, that when I interviewed historian Yual Noah Harari and I asked him, you all, what am I teaching my kids?

3:52 What are the careers they're going to have? And he's like, mansi, don't worry about all the things that you can teach them. Teach them to be teachable, because that's the only skill that they're going to need. And I was like, okay, you know, to learn unlearn, learn unlearn. Because before you know, that thing is going to be gone. And, you know, I had a principal call me the other day and he asked me, he actually found out who I was.

4:19 He's like, who is this girl who has written this post? I need to meet her. And I had written a post about the most overprotected yet undernourished generation. That was the title of my post, and I'd love for each one of you to go there and see it. But it was just absolutely what you spoke, sir, and what the play was about. Today we want to shield our children from every fall. We want to be there for them, catch them, give them all the abundance and all the luxury.

4:46 But we don't want to be for them when they fall so that we can help them climb up. We don't want them to fall, is my problem not that they should not fall. So I think that is one bit. And the other bit that I want to say is on success. Because, you know, when I started off with the presentation, when they briefed me, they said, what do you want for your kids to be? And I said, I just want them to Be great apprentices, apprentices for a lifetime, right?

5:13 Students of life. Because that's the only way that they will know that they need to keep learning, learning, learning, learning. And that got me to think of one of the times that I actually interviewed national badminton coach Pulela Gopichand. And I said, sir, you've trained everything. What is success to you? And he said to me, and this interview was almost eight years ago, but ABHI bi yeh yahi PI chipka oi. Which says, Mansi, success is not how much money you have in the bank, but it's the number of lives that you touch, right?

5:45 And to you, you have touched so many, so many, so many lives that it is absolutely brilliant. Absolutely. And to all the kids, what is most fascinating is that I have been inducted into Divine Touch by the students of the first batch. So hats off to you. And this is going to be the first generation that possibly can crack any math problem, yet sometimes find it very difficult to deal with complex emotions. They can analyze literature, but they will not be able to articulate what they are feeling.

6:17 And I think that one last bit that I want to mention is to parents, okay, I think you're doing a brilliant job of raising conscious care kids. And I'm on the other extreme, trying to raise conscious parents, because the people who come to the many, many, many different workshops that I have done because we didn't have that consciousness as millennials or baby boomers, whatever the category you fit in is that we come so broken that we are raising broken children.

6:53 So I would actually like to make a little bit of a recommendation. If I'm not stepping here. I would love to see wonder touch, magic touch, spiritual touch, and maybe parent touch. Okay? So I am sorry. I'm really sorry if I've made a recommendation out of line. I'm really sorry for that, but. And every time you have managed to pull in so many parents, trust me, if I ask parents to come for workshop, they will, you know, we'll send the kids.

7:26 Parents do not want to come. So. So that's why my recommendation on that and just the last bit to all the parents here is that build conscious connections with your children. And the reason, again, I'll come back to a brilliant story, which is when I had the privilege of interviewing Andre Agassi, who's a grand slam player, and I asked him, what is your advice to parents? He is like, rules without relationships will equal to rebellion. If you think I'm going to draw all the boundaries, I'm not going to give the phone.

7:58 I'm not going to do this. I'm not going to let them go out. I'm not going to let them drink. I'm not going to let them do this. It's not going to work. Connection. Don't expect your children that they're going to come and listen to you when they want to flee or when they feel like they have minds of their own. And just one last small story is. It's very important. So when my daughter was in grade four and she was running for a race, she's a very competitive athlete, and she was running and her friend fell, she ran, she came back, and then she paused, and I was just waiting.

8:32 What is she going to do? What do you think she would have done? Did she think she should run further or she should have paused and helped her friend? She was conflicted. She was only in grade four. She decided to help that friend because there was no first date that was immediately coming. And her friend started crying and was in so much pain that she decided to pause and she moved aside and she helped the friend and, you know, help call people.

8:52 And when she. And then she finished running her race and, you know, she was waiting for her teachers to say, well done, Anya. You did a fabulous job and you were so good. And, you know, she. She waited for that validation, but she didn't get it. But she looked at me and I did this. And trust me, she didn't win the medal, but to me, I won. Parenting. And the reason I say this is there are going to be so many moments in your life where your child is going to expect that validation.

9:20 We are living in a world that is const. Constantly asking them to do, to do, to do, to do. And while we're all learning how to be, there are so many balancing acts that we are playing. Trust me, while I'm speaking here, I'm already thinking, like, has she gone for math class? Has she done this? Has she done this? But that is what we're all doing. But that one look from you, that one validation from you is all that they need.

9:44 They need that no matter what age you come to. I mean, I'm 44 and my mom just called me to speech. I needed that, you know, and it's amazing. And my other mother is here to cheer me because she's like, I want to see you up on stage, right? So I just feel that her just being there, even when I'm this old, means the world. So to each parent, please be more conscious. And of course, you know, I'M very happy to to see how we can add that parent touch by just leaving you with the last thought, which is parenting when you have left the room.

10:22 Parenting begins when the parents have left the room. So we are able to raise children who are just as happy even when they come back home and home becomes their safe space. So thank you very much and have a great lunch. Thank you so much. Mansa for parenting tips, celebrity interviews, recipes, conversations with experts, DIYs, and lots more. Subscribe to Kidstock Press now.