What to Do When Your Child Is Talking Back To You | Dad University

0:00 smart mouth snappy giving lip sassy it doesn't matter what you call it it's not okay in this video we're dealing with kids talking back to parents why do they do it and how can we stop it every parent is going to experience some form

0:32 of back talk from their child well it certainly can happen earlier depending on their environment most kids start to do this around five or six years old pushing back and testing their boundaries is all a part of growing but the key is for us to teach them how to push back we need to teach them how to communicate effectively Jane Nelson author of positive discipline says that when a child talks back they're really expressing anger frustration fear or

1:06 hurt so if your child is talking back they're probably feeling something that they just don't know how to express well what can we do about it here are some tips and some things to keep in mind number one it's normal behavior for young kids don't freak out that your child talk back to you or begin to believe that you're living with the devil the key is to curb the behavior early so that they don't continue it as

1:36 they grow older number two don't take it personally remember something else is probably going on with them so most likely it has nothing to do with you anyway if you approach it that way you're gonna be more equipped to teach them better ways of communicating number three when they're young offer options back talk often occurs when kids don't get their way so give them alternatives in which you're happy of either choice

2:08 for example we're not gonna watch TV right now would you rather read a look or play with your Legos they get to feel like they're still in control and that can help reduce arguments number four ignore them now this doesn't work in all situations but if you're at home or in a place where you can do this this can be a good one they want you to engage so when you ignore them they begin to learn

2:37 that the bad behavior doesn't get them the response that they want number five show empathy because there could be something else going on empathy could help defuse the situation for example you might say you are really frustrated that you can't watch TV I can see how that can be upsetting the empathy shows that you hear what they are saying and oftentimes that's all they want number six give warnings on time now a

3:10 lot of battles happen over time maybe it's coming inside for dinner or a certain amount of time to play a video game etc provide warning on how much time is left for their activity hey you've got five minutes and then you're done number seven connect with them it might just be that they need a little extra attention from you check in with yourself and them and see if that's something that you can provide if it's

3:40 not right at the moment schedule it with them and let them know when it will happen for example hey after dinner you want to play some cards I'd love to play with you number eight set and follow house rules now if talking respectfully is a house rule you better make sure you're doing the same you may have to accept that they're learning their snappy attitude from you or they are hearing you yell at

4:11 them quite frequently and finally number nine positive reinforcement nothing works better than to reinforce good behavior while you might be ignoring the bad behavior make sure to make a big deal of the good behavior hey I really appreciate that you cleaned up your toys when I asked you to that was really helpful well that's all we have for today we would love to hear from you what are some challenges you have faced with your kids talking back to you leave

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