Why It's Important For Men To Show Emotions | Dad University

0:00 You big wussy Cry-baby Suck it up Have you ever heard any of these or said any of these to anyone? These are definitely some reasons why men have difficulty with emotions. Maybe you were scared and how to suppress those feelings just to feel accepted. In this video we're gonna understand why men don't show emotion and then help you understand how showing emotion can be really good for you.

0:40 Hey guys I'm Jason Kreidman and welcome to another episode of Dad University. We cover a different dad advice topic every Thursday so be sure to subscribe to the channel and click on that notification bell so you don't miss any of our videos. I saw this study that was done and it said that there was like 27 different emotions that we can experience. For the purpose of this video we're just gonna focus on six of the major ones Happiness Sadness Fear Disgust Anger and Surprise I think for men two of these really standout that we have difficulty with.

1:21 Sadness and Fear For the most part I don't think men have difficulties showing the other emotions. So let's just focus on fear and sadness. So why do men have difficulty showing these emotions? Number 1: They don't know how to show emotion. How can you show emotion if you were never taught? You know if you had a father that never cried and never really showed emotion it totally makes sense that you wouldn't know how to do it.

1:52 Let's just make sure that your son doesn't have that same excuse Number 2: Fear of weakness Did you ever hear these as a young kid boys don't cry go ahead and swallow those tears or crying is for sissies or how about what are you scared of scaredy-cat all of these phrases have negative connotations with men and emotions. Boys are taught from a very young age that if you have these emotions that's a bad thing Number 3: Fear of being judged You know this is sort of similar to the fear of weakness but men fear being judged as an emotional man. You think you'll be judged negatively you know it's that people will maybe think less of you or they'll look down at you.

2:41 You may not want to show your wife these feelings because you're worried she'll think negatively of you. Maybe she'll think you're needy or that you have low self esteem. So instead we suppress these feelings because we don't want to be seen that way. Number 4: Protecting someone else So whether it's our spouse our kids or anyone else we will refrain from having these emotions in order to protect them. We feel like if we show these emotions they may be negatively affected or impacted by them.

3:14 When my mother passed away I didn't want my kids to see me cry. I felt like that if I cried in front of them it would really upset them as well. Going through grief counseling allowed me to understand that that it was okay for me to show the emotion. It was it was authentic and it was real in fact it allowed my children to to see how I felt about my mom the reality was is that I was sad.

3:43 Now that we understand why men don't often show emotion let's take a look at why it's so important that men do show emotions Number 1: it allows you to be authentic. So humans have emotions it's reality and being authentic is important for both you and your child. In the example I provided about my mother and my kids seeing me cry it allowed them to see the real me and it was really important because I didn't have to hide it anymore I was able to be honest and authentic with them.

4:17 Number 2: improves mental health Allowing yourself to feel and express emotions is simply just good for your emotional well-being. Have you ever had some negative feelings or emotions and and when you got it out yet you just felt better. It allows you to have that mental release Number 3: Improves physical health So in addition to the mental release you can benefit from it physically as well. Bottling up emotions can actually have some physical effects on us.

4:49 You might find some neck pain or or back pain or or even pain in your chest and what you'll find is that as you release emotions you might have some of this physical pain go away. Expressing emotions can actually make you feel better you know there's a saying that's often said we're who I feel like a huge weight is lifted well that said for a reason Number 4: Can improve connection with others. So expressing emotions causes you to be vulnerable and vulnerability allows you to be more connected with other people.

5:27 Men showing emotion is important. It's important for both you and your child. Don't be afraid to shed a little tear or even admit that you're scared. I'd love to hear from you. Have you had difficulty expressing your emotions? What do you think the reason for that is? Leave your feedback in the comment section below Be sure to give this episode a thumbs up subscribe to the channel click on that notification bell and share this video on social media.

5:57 We thank you for watching and we'll see you next week!