Real Talk for Real Teachers #17: Navigating Lockdowns From An Educator's Perspective

0:00 [Music] welcome to real talk for real teachers I'm dr. Becky Bailey the creator of conscious discipline expert in education child development and a lifelong teacher and learner for those listening who are not aware of conscious discipline it is a comprehensive trauma-informed self-regulation program that integrates three wonderful things social-emotional

0:32 learning school culture and discipline conscious discipline is a brain based program that helps educators use current neuroscience understanding in regard to the impact of stress and trauma on learning it provides the seven powers for conscious adults to help teachers regulate their emotions enough to see conflict differently and the seven basic skills of discipline that empower teachers to respond to conflict in a way that instills life skills so what are real teachers real teachers are just

1:04 that real people during lockdowns real teachers are charged with managing their own fears so as to help keep their students safe and calm after lockdown real teachers are charged with helping children shift from a life-and-death drill or a real situation back to learning real teachers like real people need help in achieving these overwhelming task today we're talking about school lock downs from a teacher's perspective this is part two of a four

1:34 part series part one we discussed lock downs from the perspective of a principal lock downs and school shootings are a harsh reality facing us all since Sandy Hook 200,000 teachers and students have experienced the stress or trauma of being involved in a school shooting trauma basically is defined as a series of events or one event that overwhelms a person's ability to cope there are two components to traumatic experiences the objective one that's what's happening and the subjective one

2:05 now how we feel about it how we think about it it is the subjective experience of the event that constitutes the trauma the more you believe that you are endangered the more traumatized you will be psychologically the bottom line of trauma is overwhelming emotions and they feeling of utter helplessness it impacts the body because literally the body begins preparing you to die two people can go through the same horrible event and one person might be traumatized while another person is not

2:37 if you have not already I encourage you to watch my webinar series about trauma at consciousdiscipline.com the dilemma about lock downs is not whether we need them or not obviously they are crucial for surviving a school shooting the bigger dilemma is how do we conduct them live best through them and recover from them in such a way that learning re-enters the school building as fast as the fear dissipates today I'll be talking with two different teachers

3:05 Tiffany Taylor Tiffany has been in early childhood education for 23 years teaching both pre-kindergarten and kindergarten and also working at the district level to support teachers and Kristen Abel who spent most of her education career in fifth grade so we're gonna begin with Tiffany welcome Tiffany - real talk for real teachers thank you good to be here ok so now the last four years you've been working at Grand Avenue Elementary tell us about Grand Avenue first before

3:35 we start ok I was there six years the last four were pre-k I taught pre-k at Grand Avenue and we're actually a primary Learning Center we have headstart through second grade and we are nestled in the historic Paramore community which is one of the oldest communities in Central Florida but also the least resourced high poverty high crime and then all of the side effects of those two put together so my guess is then you do have lockdown drills even in

4:05 two primary schools yes our district requires them monthly monthly okay so tell us how the drill goes and how would you go about this with four-year-olds it's always an adventure what happens is an administrator comes on the intercom and calls the Code Red lockdown immediately we bring the children to a place where they cannot be seen from windows or any open area we check the hallways for any kids that are transitioning to classes and then we lock the doors and then turn

4:34 the lights off everything has to be quiet and still so how many four-year-olds do you have in a classroom we can have 15 to 20 I've a ver about 15 and they all sit there quietly well we try to keep that going it is a challenge but I've found my last four years experience it didn't seem to affect the kids very much they just thought we were gonna go sit down and be quiet activity they didn't quite get the

4:59 the lockdown piece so they didn't understand what was going on right and we would explain this is so if there's someone on the campus that's not safe we can keep ourselves safe and the rest of the school we all do the same thing at the same time and so you taught him the procedure just like any other procedure correct it was the same place in the same routine each time oh so they really did not comprehend the severity of the

5:25 situation not at all okay now have you had any shooters or active shooters on campus we had a situation there he wasn't actually on campus but he was at the bus stop on the corner of our campus right outside the gate came off of the bus tried to rob someone and had a rifle in hand did shoot and so we immediately went into lockdown and followed those procedures now did the kids seem to recognize that as a

5:54 gunshot no it was towards the end of the day so they were actually in activity centers I had some act or activities going on so I was standing there monitoring and I heard it and so then we came in and then we got the call from the intercom and how was that for you it was very scary because it was very close I could tell you don't know where it's coming from you don't know what's going

6:17 on if it is on campus so it was very very frightening did the kids pick up on your fear how did you manage them and you at the same time well it it was a challenge I'm sure they did pick up on my excitement my anxiousness at first but then I just reminded them this is what we're going to do I worked on my act of calming and we followed the procedures just as much as we could

6:41 so that actual training helped you it did it did so these kids come from the neighborhood of Grand Avenue kress yep so there's a good chance they are familiar with drive-by shootings or have some experience with gunshots would you agree unfortunately yes many very personal experiences family members friends so you know some kids have had people in their families that have been shot yes is there any kind of procedure they have at their home if someone gets a little out of hand with

7:12 the guns not that I know of I know it's common to just drop and crawl to try to be together in a common place but I don't think it's a very set routine or a set place so drop in the roll so did any of the kids drop and crawl or did they lay on their bellies or they sit up or what did they do over there when you got them in a quiet space well we start off

7:33 with great intentions of setting up and then as you start to see they tire because this lockdown lasted for a good 45 minutes so we just tried to keep the calm and if they needed to shift to lay down or lay back we tried to allow for that in a way that would still keep them safe but to be honest they really seem very unaffected which was that interesting yes so did you think they were unaffected because they didn't

7:59 comprehend it or because maybe they're desensitized to it my opinion is that a little bit of both just from stories they had shared with me connecting with their families and knowing things that were going on in their home life I think it was a little bit of both wow what about the older grades the second graders did you talk to some of their teachers what was the overall sense of this at the school it was almost a little excitement there was

8:25 something going down something happening in the neighborhood that was probably anxious fear but there was certainly more awareness of what was going on and we had such an excellent team in second grade that they were able to take that anxiety that excitement that fear and bring it down to a calm as well hmm so it's interesting that you use those two words anxious excited what I'm hearing you say is certainly there was fear but also there was an excitement of what's

8:51 happening who's doing it kind of like a fight you know what I mean back in the day you know you and having a fight in the courtyard at school and everybody go oh boy if I fight fight you know it's almost kind of like a curiosity as well as possible as in the fear yes exactly so do you have any suggestions for people who work in early childhood when they're in public schools and have these monthly lock downs what would be some

9:14 tips you have for those people I think it would be helpful to always relate it back to safety and this is how we take care of each other sometimes that people are angry or upset and they might do hurtful things but we can always keep ourselves safe so using that language of safety and taking care of each other also having visuals if you can of the routine maybe even taking pictures as you go through it or finding pictures on

9:38 the internet things that they can actually see this is what we're going to do and just reassuring them that my job is a safe keeper and I'm gonna do my job sounds like that's about all we can do absolutely Becky there that's really all we can do but there are some things that we can do before the actual lockdown drill happens that I think will be really helpful and I think if I had to pick three the number one thing that we

10:04 could do is to really really promote that language of safety and have a safe keeper ritual in place just constantly reminding the children that I'm the safe keeper I'm going to keep you safe from hurting on the inside and on the outside and I'm gonna do my job every day and every capacity possible so having a safe keeper ritual in the morning every morning as part of the brain Smart Start and morning routines and just using that

10:30 language of safety throughout daily interactions with the children also what was really helpful for us was having visuals to take the children step through step of what we would do in the event of a lockdown drill or an actual lockdown and helping them connect with all of the staff at Grand Avenue so that they would know that even if they weren't in the classroom with their safe keeper me that there would be everyone on campus that they had seen and gotten

10:59 used to because of our friends and family board they would be there also to be safe keepers when I taught kindergarten we would send children to the library in pairs and so if children were out in the halls during a lockdown they would have to go to the safest the closest teacher as their safe place so I wanted them to be really familiar with all of the safe keepers at Grand Avenue as well as me they're safe keeper

11:22 in our personal school family so that was helpful to have those visuals of the step-by-step process and also any person that they may come into contact with during a lockdown or any type of drill that was for their physical safety and I think the last piece is just to really really help the children practice keeping their calm and you have to keep your calm absolutely before you can teach it to them but offer suggestions for calming in action

11:53 have certain breathing techniques that you might use in a lockdown drill have a mobile safe place some of my children needed more tactile opportunities to our resources rather to feel safe so we had a little mobile safe place that we could just grab as we went to our designated space I know some teachers use silent songs or even the I Love You rituals during that time just to really help children feel safe but also developmentally be engaged for their age

12:22 level and I really think again the safe keeper piece is the biggest part because it's moments and situations like that where the safe keeper job becomes really real for young children it can be an abstract concept sometimes and so when they actually are experiencing this that physical safety and knowing that I'm there I'm going to keep them safe and whatever I need to do I'm going to do is really really helpful and Becky there is one more word of encouragement I'd like

12:52 to offer to all the other real teachers out there and that is that you know more and more of these situations are happening and they're terrifying and so scary for adults as well as for young children and even young adults but with the with the skills and the powers of conscious discipline and that constant reminder of safety for yourself and for those in your care you got this you will have what you need to get through this

13:20 and to keep the kids safe you safe and to just get through these these really difficult times or experiences and so I say that because with the power of con discipline and the power of your heart as a teacher will help you overcome this the trust that you've created with and the children or with yourself will really carry you through Thank You Tiffany thank you for your time and thank you for your dedication to children and families thank you so much

13:47 now let's turn our attention to Kristin Abel Kristen is a 25 year national board certified teacher she has a bachelor's degree in elementary education and her master's in educational leadership she has spent the majority of her teaching time in fifth grade and is a certified conscious discipline instructor welcome Kristin to real talk for real teachers thank you dr. Bailey I'm excited to be here this is an exciting topic an important topic for us to talk about it

14:15 certainly is now Before we jump into lockdowns Kristin just kind of give us a brief view of when did conscious discipline enter into your career how long have you been implementing and have you found it helpful and seen a change in what you're doing and what the children are doing - I was very fortunate to have a principal Kim Whitney back in 2003 when I was at Fern Creek Elementary who invited me to be a part of the implementation team with our

14:40 school and I went to my first CD one in 2003 and immediately began implementing conscious discipline not only in my classroom but also in my personal life I helped Fern Creek implement conscious discipline and move from a grade D at Fern Creek to a great a when we were a for three years and we attribute a lot of that to conscious discipline and the strategies we used in the ritual and that's been 15 years Wow it has been I

15:07 owe it all to the principal that brought me to my first CD one and encouraged me to continue to grow in my journey and I then followed another principal to another school and I was the only one doing conscious discipline in fifth grade at that school but I stayed strong and stayed the course and did conscious discipline not only with me but with my students and so you kept it up even though that wasn't the norm in your

15:32 school and was that because you're finding it effective or old habits or what what made you continue with it well I think because I saw a change in myself and I saw how important it was and how acted my students at Fern Creek which was a high poverty school we service the Coalition for the homeless and I saw the benefits of my students and the safety that they felt with me and the pattern-seeking that we did each day in

15:56 our classroom and so I knew the value of it and I moved to a different type of school but need was still there and I knew that my students needed those structures needed those routines needed the school family just as much as I did so that I could enjoy learning and teaching and working with them that sounds phenomenal so now let's shift to the topic at hand let's talk about active shooter drills or lock downs as

16:19 we call them do you have these procedures at your school yes and all of the schools that I have been at we have procedures in place for lockdown drills in our district also has gone a little bit further so that we have them actually separated so there are different I guess levels if you will if things happen on campus we have different sayings for each one so we know what is happening on our school okay give us an example what are the

16:43 Saints then well there's one that's locked down lay down and that is the one that is an active shooter and that's the one where you immediately turn off the lights close the doors lock and you go into a safe area with your students take your cell phone another one is they tell you to leave the campus so it's you exit you take your purse you take your cell phone and you take your students and you leave the vicinity of the school that

17:06 could be a bomb threat and there's also one where you just go into the building and you lock your doors but you're not on a laydown you're just locked into the room but you can continue on if you will with your day even though you're locked into the classroom so there's different levels that we have that we can I guess classified the situation well that does give you a little bit more information as opposed to just the basic lockdown so

17:31 do you practice these do you have drills for all these we do we have drills and I'm on the team that helps to plan when we'll have those drills and we try to have the drills even though you can never plan for a situation we try to have the drills like when the cafeteria is full or students are out at recess or people are at you knows PE or art music so that the students can experience it

17:53 at different times of the day and not just with their homeroom teacher okay so let's go back to you as the fifth-grade teacher how do you prepare your students for the drill and do you do anything helping them on two levels one know the procedure and two how are you gonna manage yourself or self-regulate as we call it in conscious discipline or do you help them with that process too or you just teach them the procedure and then just everybody go if

18:20 I do know that the drill is happening I let my students know ahead of time because I think it's important that they know we are practicing today and today is just a drill and we're going to go through the procedures and we talk through what that looks like and sounds like and what it feels like and we go through all of those things and we talk about breathing and yes we have to be quiet but you can still take your deep

18:40 breaths so we do all of those before we even start the drill so I make sure and prep my students because it's also prepping myself so if we're all in this together if they're breathing that it will help to remind myself to breathe as well if I'm breathing that it will help them to know to breathe as well - if it's a surprise drill then my first inclination is to take a breath and hope that it's a drill and if it's not a

19:02 drill then I get myself set ready to go and I grab my phone grab my list of students and I start breathing and I start making sure that my heart is full and it's wishing well so because I know my students are going to the very first thing out of their mouth is and this is able is this a drill and so I have to say I'm assuming it is but we don't know and that's why we have to we have to go

19:21 to our area so I immediately just start with I will keep you safe my job is to keep you safe let's get to where we need to be let's take a deep breath even though I'm whispering all of this I'm making sure to know that you know what to do we keep breathing we're safe I will keep you safe and we just go through that I will say it really doesn't matter if they know that there's

19:39 a drill or even if it's a surprise drill their emotions run high for both of them it is a very intense situation for a practice or even a surprise practice they are very aware of the situation and very aware of their emotions during that time all that is part of conscious discipline but what about the teachers that don't practice conscious discipline do you think they're doing anything to help these kids regulate their emotions or they just going through the procedure

20:07 of how you do it I think a lot of them are going through the procedure because I think immediately when that happens I think our fear kicks in and I have the skills to breathe and and know that I can handle whatever comes my way but I think some teachers just because they are frightened and they're not sure what to do the fear leads them and I think we hear a lot of be quiet sit down be quiet we

20:29 don't know what this is and a lot of that shortness of quick to just be quiet stop and I don't think they're breathing and I think it just revs them up which also rubs the kids up and I don't think they do it intentionally I think it's just their reaction to the situation and if I didn't have the skills of just taking deep breaths I can see myself falling into that trap as well of just short breaths and not saying what I need

20:52 to say or being short with them and not being calm and have a calm voice with my students yeah so I mean it is a natural reaction when we you have a threat around you that that would be a natural response so you would have to have a skill set to take you from that threat back up to a more calm experience yes I agree with you you would definitely need to know to take those deep breaths

21:14 you know what the plan is you know what to follow I can handle this we've practiced I know what to do whether this is a drill or if it's for real breathe I can handle this my job is to keep myself safe and my students safe and that's what I say through the whole thing and so you're doing that then during the actual drill - yes I am I'm constantly reassuring them and just touching them you know giving them a patch because

21:37 we're all crowded together you know wherever that the lockdown is in our classroom and we're all together you know one time we were at recess and we had to run in and we were in the bathroom in the library and I was like we got this we're all together everyone's here we had a couple extra kids from another class I said welcome we're gonna take deep breath we're all gonna be in here together till it's done

21:57 we can handle this take a deep breath we're all going to be safe so you just immediately start that I just start that you can handle this we're safe I will keep you safe you will keep us safe breathe we can handle this not only for me but for my students as well so all together it's just one big group of breathing people to help us get through it have you seen an actual child that to

22:20 some degree was freaking out going kind of off the deep end I have and I can think of one young man a fifth-grader in particular and this was an actual lockdown we had a criminal in the vicinity of our school who had robbed a bank and had run toward the school so they put the entire school on lockdown laid down and we were all crammed in the corner of my classroom where you fight a spot where nobody

22:43 supposedly can see you and I remember him sitting right next to me and we were all on the floor and he just looked at me I could see the fear in his face I could see the fear in his eyes and I kept saying to him it's okay we're here you can handle this I will keep you safe and I finally said to him I have a plan so I had to basically tell him that if

23:04 somebody came into the room I would help him keep him safe that I had a plan if somebody actually walked into our room he was able to go okay she has a plan I know what to do she's gonna keep me safe she's going to protect me and I think that's what he needed to hear because he you know he literally was clinging to me and this was towards the end of the year so he's almost in sixth grade he's 11

23:27 years old and and the fear was all over his face all over his body it was a really real experience for me at that time and I realized how important it is for me to make sure that my students know that that I will keep them safe that it's my job in any situation and especially this yeah and I think letting him know that you had a plan no matter what happens I got a plan you can relax

23:49 into this situation now you've been at two different types of schools so the one you mentioned earlier the Fern Creek where there was a lot of trauma in this children's lives with the homeless and everything and then you had more of a middle-class experience which doesn't mean they haven't had any trauma but it's a little bit different would you agree I agree yes it is different okay so did you notice a difference in those two schools in regard to lockdown

24:14 practices or how the children reacted or responded you know it's interesting because we had a bomb threat at Fern Creek and we had to be evacuated from the school and I remember the principal coming on and saying you know teachers please look at the back of your name badge and look at what a code blue was it must have registered on my face as to oh my goodness because they immediately just all of them saw my face and

24:39 I thought oops so I I breathed and said it's okay we got this we can handle this we're gonna leave the school for now we're gonna leave our stuff here I said I am going to take my purse and we're all gonna go out together but it was immediately as soon as I said we were leaving the school I could feel the tension the anger the anxiety rise and it just came out of all of them and then

25:03 we got bus to another school to wait for the the police department to go through our school I just was reassuring them the whole time you're safe you can handle this we're together we're safe here at the middle school waiting we'll be fine it was instantaneous with them the kids were a lot faster to react than my other students were if that makes sense yes so with the children who have had fewer resources in their lives the motion took

25:28 over them quickly and children who had had more resources there seemed to be a gradual building of the anxiety and fear yes at my other school that was more middle-of-the-road if they knew it was a drill it wasn't as intense if that makes sense they were like okay this is a drill yes this is serious when mrs. Abel's right here we'll handle it whereas at Fern Creek where we had a lot of trauma it was even a drill took me

25:53 probably a good hour to hour and a half to talk about it afterwards to get them back to where we needed to be to continue with our day where is that my my other school it would take maybe 20 minutes and we talked about it this is what happened and we could go on with our day but at Fern Creek it would probably take us a good hour after the drill to get through what we needed to

26:12 talk about before we could start working again and that's what I want to bring up next you know because we do have the before during and then we have the after after the event and these were drills so talk to me about what do you do after a drill and then we'll take on an actual lockdown that you had after a job we usually you'll stand up go back to our seats and we sit down and we talk about

26:35 and I say well what were you feeling how did it go for you and we each kind of share out and I share with them because I think it's important for students to know that I was feeling anxious even though I know it's a drill it's still important for me to make sure that I have my cell phone that I have the list of students so I you know I can keep track of them I said

26:54 so I feeling she's making sure that I followed all of the guidelines and the regulations but my main job is to keep you safe so we would go through and talk about it and we'd spend maybe 15 to 20 minutes at my school talking about it afterwards and I'd let them share and talk about it and then we would move on and continue on with you know whatever seven we were on at Fern Creek it would

27:15 probably take a little bit longer they'd have a lot more questions a lot of what if questions what would you do how would we handle this and I'd have to spend some time talking with them so it would take maybe for a drill 45 minutes to an hour with them just to kind of get them back and answer all their questions so that they felt comfortable with the drill and again when they're asking this just for the listeners when people go on

27:38 what if what if what if that's just the voice of anxiety right and so you were listening to their anxiety and letting them release some of that that was kind of pent up within so now let's take a real situation so now it's not just a drill it's an actual lockdown and there's somebody out there there's the bank robber or there's whoever mm-hmm out there what happens after that when they know it's not just a drill is it

28:05 longer or do you have different procedures or what happens when they come back to the classroom I will say the time that we were stuck in the bathroom at the library and then we had to walk back upstairs we had to spend quite a bit of time talking after that one because that was out of the ordinary it wasn't in their classroom it was outside we were at recess and then we were in a different area that wasn't

28:27 normally where they're used to doing a drill and that was just a drill the recess time into the bathroom and we had to spend a good portion of our afternoon and I thought this is more important than me finishing math and science right now so we spent some time talking about that and what would really happen if we were out on the playground and a bad person came on campus and what should we do and we talked about having all eyes

28:50 on mrs. Abel at recess and making sure you check in to see where I am on a recess field and it was great for me to hear their ideas and their concerns but that even though that was a drill it took us a little longer because it was serious again the what-ifs came up well what if this happened and what if that happened and even though that was just a drill we still took some time to talk about it

29:13 when we did have the real bank robber that was honor can you know running towards our campus that we probably spent the next day the next morning at our after our brain smart start and we actually had a class meeting about that because some students were still feeling very upset and still feeling very nervous about the day so it kind of bled into the next day we had to address it and talk about it so as you're looking at your whole class

29:36 you know 20-25 students could you tell different students who are kind of getting back in the game at different times do you know that it would take some students a little longer to settle back into learning than others yeah I would definitely say both schools that I was at some kids you might say oh well they're daydreaming but I truly think that they were sitting there just trying to wrap their mind around what had happened and some of them would go sit

30:01 in the safe place you know after that would happen and some of them would jump right back in and I would kind of watch them just to make sure they were doing okay cuz some after we talked about would go okay I'm ready to head back to math or I'm ready to head back into science and or reading and I'm kind of like okay well you know if just kind of watching them so yeah some of them were

30:18 quick and some of them it took a little bit longer but I always just kind of had that eagle eye watching to see their reactions like you said you have to talk about the situation and what happened afterwards you can't just say okay we're gonna jump back in and start in on math because a lot of students aren't capable of comprehending math right now because they're thinking of a million other things that are happening and how many

30:39 students did you see you think out of your class that looked like they were daydreaming I would have to say just thinking of my classes I have to say it's mostly my boys and I would say it was probably a good 5 4 to 5 that would just kind of be staring and daydreaming even after we had spent time talking about it and I would go around and and walk as they were doing work or as I was

31:02 teaching and just make mental note of that and then I would try to make sure that I would make some special connections with them just to make sure that they were they were feeling okay and they were able to process all of this like he said and self-regulate back to working on their work now what she said listeners was crucial on I'm just going to back up so that you truly heard what she just said is that the sense of daydreaming our

31:27 spacing out it is a sign of possibly a child had previous trauma so if you've had previous bumps in the road when these things hit it kind of knocks you into a daydreaming or a dissociative state where you know mout and you can see it in their eyes and what Kristin just said miss Abel I was going to call you because you're the teacher but what miss Abel did was she one noticed it and two made some kind of

31:53 connection I wanted you to hear that word because if she had just left it as a discussion that would have not brought them back into where they were in time and space they would have been off in a numbed out glazed-over state but by her making a connection trying to either touch them or getting some kind of eye contact she would actually bring them back into right now so good for you miss Abel thank you way to go it's vital to

32:20 make those connections and I think that is a huge part of what I needed as a teacher and what my students needed from me and I think especially nowadays with all of these drills and the situations that we're having in our society it's very important for us to have those connections now since you're in charge of the scheduling of these do you also do any training on these because what you're saying is you're doing a different kind of preparation one you're

32:49 implementing conscious discipline but also you're usually relying on that self-regulation process during these drills and the actual event so teachers who aren't using conscious discipline who are still just kind of in the rewards and Punishment stage of dealing with behavior would you be doing any training on how to teach them to breathe and what you could say during these drills or are you not in charge of that I'm not in charge of that yet but I'm

33:15 hoping next year that I will be allowed to do a little bit more of that because I think as educators we need to know how to help self-regulate ourselves during this situation but then also we can help self-regulate our students and our parents because I had I spent some time talking to some pair this year who immediately went to we need metal detectors we need bulletproof windows went and I said this is hard and we I had a talk with some of my parents

33:43 this year and we had a real open discussion and I was able to take some deep breaths with them just to help them understand that yes I agree with you but right now that may not be what's going to happen so what can we do right now so that our children feel safe at school so I'm hoping that in the future I will be able to work with my school and start training some because I think it's

34:04 beneficial for everyone in these situations and for our students and for our staff as well so that brings us up to your top three you've got the listening ear of many teachers out there and so what would be three things top three things that you say is critical for teachers to know number one number one I think that's one of the top three things is that you need to know how to take a deep breath and you need to know

34:31 how to speak to yourself inside of your brain and one of the mantras that I say that I learned from dr. Bailey on and through conscious discipline is I'm safe I can handle this and I say that all the time even when I'm in traffic even when I'm getting ready to start a lesson even when I'm picking my kids up for lunch and I know that's an area of frustration for them I'm constantly taking a deep

34:54 breath and saying that mantra to myself and I think that is one of the most important things that you can say and work on as a teacher and I would add on to that too that you can't fake calm with these kids so that's like Kristen was saying they're looking at this nonverbal behavior they're watching your face and they're watching for any sign of distress so as long as you can stay calm it has to be a true calm because it

35:20 has to show on your face all right number two I totally think that Connexions is very very important I can't begin to stress that enough I just did a training with teachers in Virginia and we had a long talk about can making connections with our students but not only with our students but also with the staff members you have on campus and the parents that you also serve as well but I think the connections that you make

35:44 with your students is priceless it is one of the biggest bangs for your buck that you can get and it's also just one of the most important things you can do okay and number three number three I think would be some people might say well I don't know about this but I really truly believe that the safe place is one of the most important things that you can have in your classroom in your office I have one here

36:09 at home for my husband and myself I was one of the things I was most scared about but it is absolutely one of the most key things in my classroom and one of the things I'm most passionate about and for those listening if you don't know about the conscious discipline safe place it is a self regulation learning center and a place to practice self regulation you know it's almost like you know we teach a math and then they get a

36:34 practice math by doing math pages so you can't just teach self regulation and not have a place for them to practice it so they have an opportunity to practice a place to go where it's legalized calming down but there are steps to it so if you want more of that you can go to the website and check it out so Kristin I want to thank you so much and also I want to thank Tiffany for joining us

37:00 without the younger kids and and you can see the difference between the younger kids and the older kids it's like they know enough to be scared to death the little ones don't know quite that much so they respond in a different way so thank you so much Kristin and good journey to you especially next year I hope you get them in charge of all the discipline of the whole world but thank you certainly at your school thank you

37:23 very much okay and for those who'd like to know what's Becky up to now well I get to work with some wonderful people with the people of Trinidad and Tobago and Trinidad and Tobago is a little island a country located off the north coast of South America about six miles from Venezuela it's a tiny country about 1.2 million people but they are the most economically developed and most ethnically diverse country in the region so they became very interested in

37:52 conscious discipline and we are going to work with about 80 teachers of different programs movers and shakers all ages from infants to adults and alternative education and boys clubs and we'll be doing a two-day in that region and very excited to be invited to be a part of a culture that enriches both of us it's a wonderful way to share conscious discipline and to learn from them at the same time so a celebration we have a big shout out this time to

38:23 Springfield Missouri they've received a million dollar grant to disseminate conscious discipline throughout the community all the way from the universities down to the elementary schools that is very exciting and some of you might go oh wow how lucky are they well it wasn't luck they started this 20 years ago I remember going out there 20 years ago when we first started conscious discipline so some very passionate persistent and dedicated people hung on to it spread it little by

38:53 little until the whole community saw that it was helping them and now they're just taking off that's a very exciting and so big ol Yahoo for Springfield Missouri for the rest of you for those listening until next time I wish she left for more episodes of real talk with real teachers by dr. Becky Bailey visit consciousdiscipline.com forward slash podcasts you can also subscribe to this

39:24 podcast on itunes stitcher or your favorite podcast app